This is a brilliant post Amity! It will resonate with so many people. I totally get the two-drink abandon, you explain it so well.
My son (who is an entertainer) stopped drinking four years ago, I think he smokes weed though - he lives in the NL where it’s freely available. So prob gets a buzz from that. I’m not suggesting this for you btw, it just made me reflect.
I wish you lived nearer to me - we could have some fun…
When you come to visit, we shall beat the dogs up with their lion and bobcat plushies whilst listening to 90s music. The fix is short-lived but very very fun.
- Knowing I’ve got a few episodes and a couple of tubs of Ben and Jerrys in the freezer.
- Watching the dogs play in the park.
- Having a house full of people that I can shout at/entertain/hold court.
- Good conversation around a dinner table. (Not with my kids but other people).
- Running (when decrepit joints allow).
- Building Lego. I still want to make the Simpson’s house.
- Knitting
I think the best thing I’ve learnt recently is that IDGAF what anyone else thinks of my fun of choice and that in itself is so liberating! And also playful. And makes me feel 12 years old which is where I want to be most of the time!
I love your list, Jo! Building Lego is a good one, I used to love doing that with the kids. I might look into getting a couple of kits. And you're right about adopting an IDGAF attitude about what we consider fun now, and that it can be liberating to do so. :-)
This is a good question. I feel i am so bad at this. In fact one of my big insecurities in life is not being seen as a fun person, or boring!!
Generally socialising with someone where there is good chemistry and energy goes a long way, catching up on life etc.
there is something vulnerable about letting go and having fun and experiencing un self conscious joy. It does not always feel safe and i guess alcohol “helps” mask that fear.
I can say with 100% certainty that you are not boring, April! I love talking to you so much, you're one of the most interesting people I know. You're right that there is something vulnerable about letting go of inhibitions and social norms without the aid of alcohol, and I suppose, like anything, is something I will get better at in time. I just have to keep putting myself out there and trying. And creating my own fun too, through my hobbies.
I love this so much Amity! It reminds me of this quote I saw years ago that still makes me laugh:
"Just because I choose not to drink doesn't automatically make me no fun. That is a separate choice, which I have also made." 😂
But seriously, it's really difficult when drinking was our only source of fun and play for such a long time. It's like we have to learn all over again how do it the right way. For me, this felt really unnatural at first. I didn't grow up with parents who liked to play with me, which meant I was basically starting from scratch. But my kids were good teachers and once I learned from them, I was able to do it better on my own. Funnily enough, it's all stuff I loved as a child: riding bikes, swimming, dancing, writing fictional stories, crafting, playing basketball (I just played a couple weeks ago in a parents vs kids game for my sons' bball league and the endorphin rush was UNREAL), playing board/card games with friends or my family. For me, I have to reach way back and remember what I loved as a kid. It's all right there waiting for adult me to chill the hell out and remember how to play.
Oh my gosh, that quote is hilarious! :-D I love the activities you listed, great ideas. I hadn't thought of crafting as a form of playing but it very much is. I used to love doing collages when I was a kid, I really want to get back into that. I wish I could get back into horse riding as well, as that was something I really enjoyed, but unfortunately my joints won't allow for that. Crafting is a good place to start though, so thanks for sharing that tip.
Do you follow @In Progress from Meg Fatharly? She does amazing mini collages and I’ve seen some others using her work as a jumping off point for their own collages.
This is a brilliant post Amity! It will resonate with so many people. I totally get the two-drink abandon, you explain it so well.
My son (who is an entertainer) stopped drinking four years ago, I think he smokes weed though - he lives in the NL where it’s freely available. So prob gets a buzz from that. I’m not suggesting this for you btw, it just made me reflect.
I wish you lived nearer to me - we could have some fun…
I wish we lived nearer too! I’m determined to come visit you this year though. 🙂
When you come to visit, we shall beat the dogs up with their lion and bobcat plushies whilst listening to 90s music. The fix is short-lived but very very fun.
That actually does sound very fun, I’m in! Can we get glow sticks too? 😄
Yes! Wait until you play with the laser pointer with them. Donny is like a cat but more dumb and joyful.
I get a buzz off really strange things now.
- Knowing I’ve got a few episodes and a couple of tubs of Ben and Jerrys in the freezer.
- Watching the dogs play in the park.
- Having a house full of people that I can shout at/entertain/hold court.
- Good conversation around a dinner table. (Not with my kids but other people).
- Running (when decrepit joints allow).
- Building Lego. I still want to make the Simpson’s house.
- Knitting
I think the best thing I’ve learnt recently is that IDGAF what anyone else thinks of my fun of choice and that in itself is so liberating! And also playful. And makes me feel 12 years old which is where I want to be most of the time!
I love your list, Jo! Building Lego is a good one, I used to love doing that with the kids. I might look into getting a couple of kits. And you're right about adopting an IDGAF attitude about what we consider fun now, and that it can be liberating to do so. :-)
This is a good question. I feel i am so bad at this. In fact one of my big insecurities in life is not being seen as a fun person, or boring!!
Generally socialising with someone where there is good chemistry and energy goes a long way, catching up on life etc.
there is something vulnerable about letting go and having fun and experiencing un self conscious joy. It does not always feel safe and i guess alcohol “helps” mask that fear.
I can say with 100% certainty that you are not boring, April! I love talking to you so much, you're one of the most interesting people I know. You're right that there is something vulnerable about letting go of inhibitions and social norms without the aid of alcohol, and I suppose, like anything, is something I will get better at in time. I just have to keep putting myself out there and trying. And creating my own fun too, through my hobbies.
I love this so much Amity! It reminds me of this quote I saw years ago that still makes me laugh:
"Just because I choose not to drink doesn't automatically make me no fun. That is a separate choice, which I have also made." 😂
But seriously, it's really difficult when drinking was our only source of fun and play for such a long time. It's like we have to learn all over again how do it the right way. For me, this felt really unnatural at first. I didn't grow up with parents who liked to play with me, which meant I was basically starting from scratch. But my kids were good teachers and once I learned from them, I was able to do it better on my own. Funnily enough, it's all stuff I loved as a child: riding bikes, swimming, dancing, writing fictional stories, crafting, playing basketball (I just played a couple weeks ago in a parents vs kids game for my sons' bball league and the endorphin rush was UNREAL), playing board/card games with friends or my family. For me, I have to reach way back and remember what I loved as a kid. It's all right there waiting for adult me to chill the hell out and remember how to play.
Oh my gosh, that quote is hilarious! :-D I love the activities you listed, great ideas. I hadn't thought of crafting as a form of playing but it very much is. I used to love doing collages when I was a kid, I really want to get back into that. I wish I could get back into horse riding as well, as that was something I really enjoyed, but unfortunately my joints won't allow for that. Crafting is a good place to start though, so thanks for sharing that tip.
Do you follow @In Progress from Meg Fatharly? She does amazing mini collages and I’ve seen some others using her work as a jumping off point for their own collages.
Yes! I love her stuff and it’s what made me decide to get back into it
Burlesque classes did this for me. I'm not well enough to dance at the moment, I do miss it.