Picky bits of my mind

The Google searches of a midlife woman in midsummer

Photo by Jessica Ruscello on Unsplash

I’ve been working on an essay about burnout recovery this week, but ever since the weather warmed up it’s become increasingly difficult to focus on such a serious topic. Who wants to write about burnout when they’re burning up? Not me, that’s who.

So in the spirit of the Great British Moaning Public when the temperature gets above 24 degrees and no one wants to turn their ovens on, I am offering up a ‘picky bits’ post. [If you’re not British and don’t know what ‘picky bits’ is, it is a protected human right that allows mothers to throw a selection of store-bought coldcuts, bread, cheese, and salad on the table when it’s hot outside and call it dinner, because they’ll be damned if they’re going to produce any more underboob sweat by turning on any appliances that emit heat.]

So instead of burnout, I am giving you a glimpe of something much more personal, embarrassing, and emotionally devastating: my Google search history for the past week.

History

• How long ago was the Roman Empire

• What was before the Roman Empire

• Why are men obsessed with the Roman Empire

• What were the medieval kingdoms of Britain called

• Joan of Arc French army

• Female warriors

Current Events

• Who is Vance Boelter

• Anti-abortion fanatics

• US woman in coma forced to birth baby

• Iran response to Israel attack

• Air India survivor how?!

• Air India survivor what seat was he in

• Survivor’s guilt suicide rate

• Ballymena riots

Celebrities

• How old are Lily Allen’s childen

• Jameela Jamil body neutrality

• What is Pamela Adlon doing now

• Timothee Chalomet awards Oscars 2025

• Did Edward Norton play banjo in A Complete Unknown

• Were Bob Dylan and Johnny Cash friends

• Miranda July kind of irritating

Health

• Laparoscopic hysterectomy prep and recovery

• How long before I can drive after hysterectomy

• Post surgical blood thinners and BMI

• What age colonoscopy NHS

• What age mammogram NHS

• Back massager velcro strap

• Tramadol prolonged use liver damage

• Microdosing mushrooms energy mood

Travel

• Train from Rotterdam to Den Haag

• Den Haag city forest

• Amsterdam canal rides Sundays

• Non-alcoholic drinks Amsterdam

• Sober in Amsterdam fun

• Train luggage rack Netherlands

• Is Trance Buddha club still open

• Bullog Amsterdam 1998 photos

Household / DIY

• Hisense American fridge freezer ice machine not working

• Hisense repairs out of warranty

• Why do appliances break right after warranty runs out

• Conspiracy of appliances breaking

• DIY courses near me

• B&Q deck stain

• Wood glue what kind

Books / Music / TV / Film

• Shows like Better Things

• Feel good shows 2024 2025

• Reviews of Good Material by Dolly Alderton

• Margaret Atwood latest book

• Stevie Nicks singing Silver Spring live

• Live Aid Freddie Mercury

• Paul Rudd films

• Wild Dark Shore by Charlotte McConaghy

• New Wet Leg song

Food

• Glaze for portobello mushrooms

• Leftover roast chicken ideas

• Dried soup mix ratio to water for broth

• How many calories in a Magnum

• Sugar content pressed apple juice

• Vegetarian curry recipe butternut squash

• Italian meatballs authentic

Identity Crises and Midlife Conundrums

• Oppositional defiant disorder

• Autism diagnosis woman 45 years old

• Changing career frequently in 40s

• Why am I so unmotivated

• Therapy or cleaner which to choose

• Career counselling near me

• Cleaning strategy that I won’t hate

• Why is Gen X so forgotten

• Latchkey kids 80s emotional trauma

Finances

• Is it bad to borrow money from kids [asking for a friend, obviously]

• Freelance income streams for writer

• Finding old pensions

• Pension entitlement when spouse dies

• Cancelling TV licence what can they do

• HMRC tax codes refund

• Living without a car

Random

• Synonyms for dichotomies

• Synonyms for dogma

• Why do some people say M for Mother

• Phonetic alphabet official

• Why is ChatGPT so slow today

• Father’s Day gift ideas teens

• M&S Eva bootcut jeans

• Cats chattering at birds video

As it turns out, my burnout essay can wait. But these pressing matters — like whether I need a colonoscopy, what to do with leftover chicken, and whether Edward Norton plays the banjo — simply could not.

Happy Solstice for Saturday, folks. May your underboob sweat be minimal, and may your picky bits be sublime. And if you want to share a snippet from your own Google search history so I feel less insane, I’m all ears.

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