I've wanted to write this for a long, long time but have been too scared, so thank you for sharing these thoughts! Recent events have shown that even people once considered friends can turn into bullies. The irony is that despite their calls for me to use my voice, they don't want the real, authentic me, they want a group-think robot. And because I refuse to be that, I am silenced.
Well done for stepping away.
My attempts to find spaces that support my mental health, like this place - and building the DD Patreon where hopefully I can create a haven for DDs without the dangerous, manipulative algorithms - is ongoing.
The problem we have is the human desire to find echo chambers, rather than put in the effort to build brave spaces where disagreement doesn't turn into violence but creates mutual understanding, compromise and creative solutions. It seems most people are not at all interested in putting in that effort.
Telling people what to do never ends well, especially for those of us who value independent thought. Whatever happened to leading by example and inspiring others to join your cause rather than strong-arming and guilting them into it? Who wants people in their movement who are only there because they’re scared not to be? That’s not social justice, that’s a dictatorship. And I don’t deal with dictators.
Precisely! Putting in the effort to build a broad church that many can join is just too much work, obviously. The ability to welcome nuance, and five deep into it is gone, as is the empathy to be curious as to WHY people may disagree with you. In that WHY is the potential for deep learning and it scares me that we're losing that.
The potential for gathering, organising campaigns and sharing words of beauty, pain and growth of socmed is wonderful, but the toxic nature of the algorithms and the way it feeds the human need for validation and immediate action is very dangerous indeed.
I think if we are to continue using it, people will need an education on how to extract the good juice and protect themselves from the poison.
I've wanted to write this for a long, long time but have been too scared, so thank you for sharing these thoughts! Recent events have shown that even people once considered friends can turn into bullies. The irony is that despite their calls for me to use my voice, they don't want the real, authentic me, they want a group-think robot. And because I refuse to be that, I am silenced.
Well done for stepping away.
My attempts to find spaces that support my mental health, like this place - and building the DD Patreon where hopefully I can create a haven for DDs without the dangerous, manipulative algorithms - is ongoing.
The problem we have is the human desire to find echo chambers, rather than put in the effort to build brave spaces where disagreement doesn't turn into violence but creates mutual understanding, compromise and creative solutions. It seems most people are not at all interested in putting in that effort.
I also loved what you said about building brave spaces where actual discourse can happen. Yes to that!
It's from a poem:
Invitation to Brave Space
“Together we will create a brave space
Because there is no such thing as a “safe space”
We exist in the real world
We all carry scars and we all have caused wounds.
In this space
We seek to turn down the volume of the outside world,
We amplify voices that fight to be heard elsewhere,
We call each other to more truth and love,
We have the right to start somewhere and continue to grow.
We have the responsibility to examine what we think we know.
We will not be perfect.
This space will not be perfect.
It will not always be what we wished it to be.
It's by Mickey Scottbey Jones, developed from an original by Beth Strano.
But it will be our brave space together,
And we will work on it side by side.”
– *Micky ScottBey Jones*
Telling people what to do never ends well, especially for those of us who value independent thought. Whatever happened to leading by example and inspiring others to join your cause rather than strong-arming and guilting them into it? Who wants people in their movement who are only there because they’re scared not to be? That’s not social justice, that’s a dictatorship. And I don’t deal with dictators.
Precisely! Putting in the effort to build a broad church that many can join is just too much work, obviously. The ability to welcome nuance, and five deep into it is gone, as is the empathy to be curious as to WHY people may disagree with you. In that WHY is the potential for deep learning and it scares me that we're losing that.
The potential for gathering, organising campaigns and sharing words of beauty, pain and growth of socmed is wonderful, but the toxic nature of the algorithms and the way it feeds the human need for validation and immediate action is very dangerous indeed.
I think if we are to continue using it, people will need an education on how to extract the good juice and protect themselves from the poison.